In this modern era, it is very important to guide our Muslim generation about the sacredness and importance of love and marriage in Islam.
As it is stated in the Holy Quran, Allah created everything in pairs:
“Exalted is He who created all pairs, from what the earth grows and from themselves and from what they do not know.” (Surah Yaseen, Verse:36)
One cannot deny the importance of love & marriage as it is from the fitrah and also, it’s a sunnah. Prophet Mohammed (peace be upon him) said: “There is no monasticism in Islam.”
In another hadith, it is quoted: “That person who turns away from my sunnah is not from me.”
Purpose of marriage:
The question arises; why a peron has to marry? It is important for the following reasons:
1) To stay away from sinning.
2)To complete half of our deen.
3) To have children.
4)To achieve peace And tranquility.
5) For the natural desire of love & companionship.
Criteria for marriage:
A person may be married for four reasons i.e wealth, lineage, beauty and deen. One should always give priority to the deen because wealth may become a trial, lineage and beauty cannot save a peron while deen is the sole purpose of life.
It is said in a hadith: “When the one whom you are pleased with his deen and his manners comes to you seeking your daughter in marriage, marry her; otherwise, fitnah and great corruption will become rampant on earth” (Tirmidhi & Ibn-e-Majah)
So, two things should mainly be considered in a person for marriage; deen and kuff (compatibilty).
Process of marriage:
A point that should strickly be considered is that the teachings of the Shariah should be followed during the whole process of marriage. Advice from the righteous people and inquiry should be done in order to avoid any doubtful condition and last but not the least, duas and istikhara should be performed.
1. Love Marriage.
2. Completely Arranged.
Marriage is process in which two families link together. That’s why this point should be kept in mind before choosing a person that it should not only be a choice of two persons but also the families so that there may be barakah in the marriage.Secondly, Prophet Mohammed (peace be upon him) himself advised that the prospective spouses should see each other before marriage as it creates love between the two so, the concept of totally arranged marriage, where the two are not even familier with each other should not be followed.
When to get married?
There are several conditions that may be considered while proceeding to get married as the physical, financial and psycological conditions may deeply effect the marriage.
Marriage becomes obligatory when a person is certain of committing a sin, wajib when fears committing a sin. It is emphasized sunnah (sunnah al-muakkadah) when there is no fear of sinning and can afford a wife, is prohibitively disliked (makruh-e-tehreemi) when one fears being unjust to the spouse and it is unlawful when one is certain of being unjust to the spouse.
1. The best time is a Friday after the ‘Asr prayer in the masjid.
2. Scholars and other pious people should be invited to gain the blessing of their presence and their du’as along with the blessing of Friday and the masjid.
3. The nikah should be performed by a pious person.
4. The marriage payment [dowry or mahr] should be stipulated beforehand and the person performing the ceremony should be informed of the amount.
5. The bride should preferably send a wali (her father, uncle, brother or any such elder) to represent her.
6. When the bride grants her wali [representative] the permission to marry her to the groom, it is preferable to have two people (from among her mahrams) to witness this also.
7. The sunnah khutba [sermon] will be recited first by the imam performing the marriage.
8. It is then sunnah the next day or the day after once the couple have consummated their marriage or entered into privacy together to provide a walima reception.
May Allah guide us all to lead our lives accordng to the teachings of Shariah (Aameen).