When it comes to family and relationships, it becomes important to discuss about the character traits that are essential in a human-being to be a good father, mother, sister, brother, husband, wife or an in-law.
The beauty of relationships lies in understanding, sacrifice, being kind and just, correcting the wrong one, standing with the right person, regardless of any personal inclination or favoritism and never hitting the other person’s dignity unjustly.
A great demise of a happy and loving family comes when there is a lack of privacy. The story making evil ones not only create drama, but also humiliate and weaken themselves. A person cannot achieve respect and nobility from a society if he/she claims to possess bad terms with every single member of their family, bad mouth them and play politics, forgetting all their sacrifices and the good they did to them.
It’s true that we can’t make a decision to choose our parents or siblings, but still, they are a gift of God. We spend our whole lot of years with them, are used to deal with them and are aware of their nature, so, many times it’s not an issue when a problem arises. But suppose there is a misunderstanding, a better way is trying to understand the situation of the other person and try to be forgiving instead of being judgmental.
As far as the future spouse and in-laws are concerned, one should be very careful in choosing a person and should also not forget the fact that analyzing the nature of their parents is as important as the future spouse’s because humans are born with a nature to obey their parents or at least, one of them.
Once you or your family choose someone, it should be with the intention of “growing” a family, not “dividing” and destroying them. The thing that people forget most often is that they are not “outsiders.”
One should try to understand each other’s nature, be as forgiving and kind as one is supposed to do with their own family.
A single person of bad traits is enough to destroy the whole family. That’s why there is a proper system introduced by Allah that every country, every family has a head whose responsibility is to ensure that everything works out in a perfect manner.
Abdullah Ibn Umar reported that Prophet Mohammad (peace be upon him) said: “Every one of you is a shepherd and is responsible for his flock. The leader of people is a guardian and is responsible for his subjects. A man is the guardian of his family and he is responsible for them. A woman is the guardian of her husband’s home and his children and she is responsible for them. The servant of a man is a guardian of the property of his master and he is responsible for it. No doubt, every one of you is a shepherd and is responsible for his flock.” (Sahih Al-Bukhari 6719, Sahih Muslim 1829)
If the head of the family possesses all the mentioned qualities, he/she can raise and gather the family in an excellent way regardless of some fuss makers. But if the head is not so wise, the family is likely to be shattered.
So, a strong, wise head who possess a full authority over the household is very important to raise a happy, productive and loving family.
Article By: Stoori
Image: M.Mariam Artworks